how having no concept of where you are going next can actually bring awareness into where it is that you are right now
this is a long overdue prologue to this blog, which is now unfortunately closer to an epilogue. But I hope it's not too late to describe the plan and purpose of this trip, for anyone who doesn't already know or hasn't already figured it out. We (myself, husband Chris, and 14 month old boy Bodhi) are traveling around Europe for three months. The plan was basically to start in Southern Italy and go wherever our whims and instincts took us from there. Maybe stay in Italy, maybe tour throughout Europe. Right now, we are in the touring part, having spent two months in Italy with the main purpose of studying and learning Italian.
Now we are off discovering and revisiting our favorite spots in Europe while we have the chance. Maybe our travels will continue beyond the three months, maybe not. We have no demands pulling us back home, except for friends and family connections. No house, no cars, no bills, no jobs, no school, and stuff in holding at a storage facility, available whenever we decide to come pick it up. I think my husband is hoping we will conveniently forget about it all and just leave it behind altogether. Our stuff that comprised most of our so-called life to this point. It is funny how much your stuff gathers importance and becomes synonymous with your being. And parting with it can be difficult - it feels like you are leaving behind parts of yourself.
This is the journey we are on. To rediscover our lives, to take it day by day... and hopefully through the process, to become more enlightened, more in tune with our own paths, and more present to our daily lives as they are unfolding. This has been the goal and the hope for our three month experiment abroad, and I am embarrassed to admit, I have repeatedly fallen sort of this goal. Rushing to judgment about a new place, complaining about our situation, whining about various difficulties when the tough days occur... I wish it were as easy as having the INTENTION to be mindful, and voila, there you have it. But no, it is a continual practice that waxes and wanes like a natural phenomenon. Some days, you have it, other days it eludes and taunts. And the person who you are is unrecognizable, unaware. I read a wonderful sentence about mindfulness & meditation by Jon Kabat Zinn, that meditation is 'simply about being yourself and knowing a little something about who that is'.